Thank you so much for your interest in The Insight, by Sheba. I hope you enjoyed this week’s blogs about “Trust.”

Next week’s topic will be “Gossip”

Friday Review: Happy Reading!

1. How Does it Grow?

• Trust is an integral part of developing healthy, fulfilling relationships and it requires time to grow and build. To maintain balance within the relationship, be sure to put forth the same effort you expect from your partner, and make your expectations and boundaries clear when it comes to trust. Build positive relationships that are worth keeping from the ground up with trust as your foundation.

2. The Mad Scientist

• Even when we don’t realize it, our minds are working hard to protect us and keep us moving. Trust your mind to take the right measures and messages to keep you safe, and help you grow physically and mentally. Our minds enable us to do things we may never have thought possible, like restoring the trust that was once lost.

3. Through Each Stage

• Each of Erikson’s stages of identity development rely on relationships. We begin developing our identity based on trust in our earliest relationships. The significance of trust in our lives does not diminish as we grow older, but rather helps us process through the remaining developmental stages of identity in life and becomes an integral part of our self as we age.

4. Forgive and Forget

• Deciding to place your trust in someone who had broken it in the past is a difficult, but not impossible endeavor. Anyone can change if they want to. It’s up to you to believe that they have enough resilience to take the risk. Depending on your understanding of the situation, your perception of the person, and their desire to make amends, you may decide to offer a second chance. But if you do, make sure you don’t listen to anyone else’s opinion because it’s you that has decided to take a chance, not them.

The Insight: Trust is fragile and precious. We tend to give it freely, but take it back once threatened. Your ability to discern trustworthiness in others, understand the factors that influence your decisions and willingness to forgive enables you to focus on the future. Holding grudges for wounds of the past is never healthy. Be forgiving, but cautious. Surround yourself with positive, trustworthy people.

Have a wonderful weekend!

By Sheba

www.bySheba.com

Creating Positive Perspectives for Life

The Scenario: A broken window can be put back together but it takes patience, and great effort. However, when you’ve finally glued the pieces back together, the cracks are still visible. Trust is far more fragile than glass. Once broken, the hardest decision to make is whether or not to piece it back together.

How do we decide whom to trust again?

According to a report entitled “How Implicit Beliefs Influence Trust Recovery,” by Michael P. Haselhuhn, Maurice E. Schweitzer, and Alison M. Wood, there are two beliefs systems we use when determining trustworthiness. Read More

1. Entity Belief

• The belief that trust is a personal characteristic that an individual exhibits. Should that individual break trust, he or she is no longer trustworthy.

2. Incremental Belief

• The belief that an individual can become trustworthy based on his or her desire to change and the circumstances under which they were untrustworthy.

The Insight: Deciding to place your trust in someone who has broken it in the past is a difficult, but not an impossible endeavor. Anyone can change if they want to. It’s up to you to believe that they have enough resilience to take the risk. Depending on your understanding of the situation, your perception of the person, and their desire to make amends, you may decide to offer a second chance. But if you do, make sure not to listen to other opinions because it’s you that has decided to take a chance, no one else.

Can you forgive once trust is broken?

By Sheba

www.bySheba.com

Creating Positive Perspectives for Life

The Scenario: Maslow’s hierarchy of needs states that in order for us to reach self-actualization there are certain needs that must first be met. This is a similar concept to developing, building and learning to trust.

What are the stages that enable us to become trusting adults?

Psychologist Erik Erikson’s model for psychosocial development offers eight different stages of identity for every transitional age we experience throughout life:

1. Trust v. Mistrust

• We learn what trust is and how to trust during our infant years based on whether or not our needs are met and how frequently.

2. Autonomy v. Shame and Doubt

• Encouragement of early decision-making encourages one to continue making decisions and builds a sense of confidence in one’s ability to survive.

3. Initiative v. Guilt

• Affirmation of initiative builds confidence in one’s ability to lead. Without support, initiatives are abandoned and one assumes the role as the follower.

4. Industry v. Inferiority

• Initiative continues through puberty, although still in need of encouragement to encourage the pursuit of future goals and accomplishments.

5. Identity v. Role Confusion

• One discerns interests from past experiences that lead to the pursuit of corresponding careers and relationships for the future.

6. Intimacy v. Isolation

• One develops a tendency toward intimacy or isolation based on his or her past experiences while exploring new relationships.

7. Generativity v. Stagnation

• One analyzes and measures life choices, such as career path, relationships, etc., and either perceives them as productive or unproductive according to his or her current contribution to society.

8. Ego Integrity v. Despair

• One reflects on life choices and experiences and decides that he or she has led a fulfilling life or has not.

The Insight: Each of Erikson’s stages of identity development rely on relationships. We begin developing our identity based on trust in our earliest relationships. The significance of trust in our lives does not diminish as we grow older, but rather helps us process through the remaining developmental stages of identity in life and becomes an integral part of our self as we age.

Have you experienced the stages?

By Sheba

www.bySheba.com

Creating Positive Perspectives for Life

The Scenario: The brain is like a mad scientist, working all hours of the day and into the night, sending various signals to the rest of the body to make sure things function properly. It produces and transmits chemicals within the body to send those messages. From movement, to speech, to the perception of emotion, the brain controls everything, even our ability to trust.

How does the brain influence the ability to trust?

A new study measuring influences of oxytocin on trust, conducted by the Regenerative Medicine Research Team at the University of Zurich, suggests that the hormone’s influence is wide-ranging.

Oxytocin facilitates:

1. Trust Development

• Oxytocin receptors are abundant in the amygdala, which is the part of the brain responsible for emotions and emotional learning, thus the greater the presence of oxytocin, the more likely one is to learn trust.

2. Risk Taking

• The greater the likelihood of an individual to trust, the less likely that individual is to perceive risk, which increases the individual’s likelihood to take risks.

3. Repair of Broken Trust

• Oxytocin has demonstrated the ability to lower defense mechanisms raised as a result of broken trust to enable an individual to trust again and continue to take risks.

The Insight: Even when we don’t realize it, our minds are working hard to protect us and keep us moving. Trust your mind to take the right measures and messages to keep you safe, and help you grow physically and mentally. Our minds enable us to do things we may never have thought possible, like restoring the trust that was once lost.

Do you trust what your brain tells you?

By Sheba

www.bySheba.com

Creating Positive Perspectives for Life

The Scenario: Money doesn’t grow on trees, but it’s a universal need. We work hard to earn it and we work even harder to preserve it. It’s becoming more and more difficult to come by, and it hurts to watch it dwindle. We can think about trust in the same context.

Where does trust come from?

According to professors F. David Schoorman, Ph. D,  Roger C. Mayer, Ph. D., and James H. Davis, Ph. D., a common misconception about trust is that it is a character trait. In fact, trust is something that occurs and develops strictly within. It is also a direct result of our past relationships with family, friends and partners. The factors that influence the development and growth of trust in relationships are:

1. Amount of time invested in the relationship
2. Equal consideration of personal interests and the interest of the relationship partner
3. Mutuality of trust between partners
4. Emotional state of either partner

The Insight: Trust is an integral part of developing healthy, fulfilling relationships and it requires time to grow and build. To maintain balance within the relationship, be sure to put forth the same effort you expect from your partner. Make your expectations and boundaries clear. Build positive relationships from the ground up with trust as your foundation.

How long does it take someone else to earn your trust?

By Sheba

www.bySheba.com

Creating Positive Perspectives for Life